Enough already!

My house is beyond disgusting. It smells like cat urine and feces. There's cat feces in the corner, where our Christmas tree once stood. The smell of urine permeates the main floor. The smell of cat vomit permeates my bedroom. The cat puked at 1am, which left me cleaning cat puke from the carpet at 1am, nearly causing me to puke at 1am. Gord didn't even notice the smell. Huh? She's a very old cat. She needs to be put to rest. Why won't my dh just bring her in? I keep asking him. I just wish for once he'd make a decision and not leave everything always up to me. I'd do it, but I'm an emotional person and wouldn't be able to drive back home safely.

My kids are fighting, snipping at each other. We tried to go sledding, only to have C throw a massive fit after her 2nd trip down the hill. She screamed the whole walk home, which thankfully is only about 2 mins. (2 too long imho) C calmed down once we were home, but this afternoon, declared she couldn't do school because our classroom is a mess. WFT? and the Playdoh/beads/kitchen toys in there are MY doing? The whole house looks like no one cares. And yes, you may be saying "But Julia, you're online blogging when you could be cleaning it up" It's such a mess that I can't even fathom where to begin cleaning it up. I'm sure the cat feces in the corner is a good start.

I just heard the LEGO being dumped on the floor. I'm surprised they found space to dump it. There are crackers on the basement floor from Monday afternoon, cookies from yesterday. Juice boxes with varying degrees of contents thrown everywhere. Only good thing: The laundry is done. It's hanging to dry in the basement. yes, HANGING. My dryer makes loud noises still. Hanging it isn't a problem, the laundry gets folded right away that way, but it still requires someone to put it AWAY.

My shoulders and neck are stiff. I'm beyond exhausted. I don't know where to put half the junk that needs to be put away. I haven't a clue how to make the carpet not smell. It's so bad, I took pictures of each room, just to prove the point. It makes me want to cry.

What I really need: Someone to take my kids for 2 days, some good 'moving' music, and coffee. An extra set of cleaning hands, or even someone just to keep me on track while I work. I'd ask my Mom, but with my Dad's condition, it's too difficult for her. I'd ask my mil, but she has health problems. I feel very isolated and alone.

Some days I think "lets move! That way I have to pack or toss everything in the house, and a new place would be a fresh start" But to where? And who would want this place, in it's deplorable condition. Cabinet doors falling off, flooring peeling, carpet smelling of cat. Not to mention the torture of keeping it show-able all the time. I am trying to stay positive. It's been easier to just let things go, I'm not stewing about the problems like I did in the past, but I'm so done with this. This mess, this house. It never stops.

I'll get off my rant now. I hear R yelling "STOP" at C again, she doesn't listen to me or him.

I'm going to get my Zen, put some happy music on, and attempt to salvage this house.

Ohh, and if you're a telemarketer and call me, violating any of the DNCL rules, I WILL report you. (ok, ADT just called, and I just did)